I prefer not to speak of this because it's so disturbing but I'm not seven any more. I am 16 and I'm in control.
I suffer from Nightmares and anxiety...
I also suffer from Sleep Paralysis.
I really wish I could explain this in a way that you wont think I'm completely physco but that's almost impossible.
Sleep Paralysis is when you're a wake in your sleep. Well. more like you're awake in your own body. You're fully aware of everything but you can't open your eyes, you can't move, you can't scream as much as you try. There is a crushing weight on your chest,you feel as if a spirit came in your room and is hugging you so tight that it's suffocating you..
Just when you think it can't get worse you hear thumping all over the walls I use to attempt to fight it and I'd wrestle with it as I grew older I realized that only made it last longer, so I just prayed and prayed and told God to set me free.
YOU'RE TOTALLY CREEPING ME OUT RIGHT NOW NAT!
sorry.
When I wake up my heart is going nuts and I'm sweating and breathing really hard.
It's just unreal what all goes on through this.
It physically, mentally, and emotionally wears me out.
This happens often, it usually just doesnt happen more than once for most people. I know people say it isn't a demon that it just feels that way.
But what I've went through is just beyond sleep paralysis in general.
I've experienced some spiritual war fares at such a young age and have had to mature in that aspect. I want to say that if you have this you're NOT alone that if a bad presence comes and visits you at night YOU'RE NOT ALONE. I never went to a doctor or treatment or anything it took me years to realize that I wasn't alone in this... I just had serious talks with adult members. I understand what disturbs me at night and why.
Gods in control and he allows you to experience things so you know that the enemy will do whatever it takes to make you fear. It's a constant fight.
But just know...
That you were declared the winner, the conqueror,when his blood was shed on that cross.
Hey i am friends with your sister Lilly and we were just talking about this,then she mentioned your blog and i read it and feel as though you worded this most perfect, as i experience this too. I feel like there are many ways to interpret this and your interpretation is flawless in my eyes because i too connect it to religious views; embracing it is always what i have done in a way that i would just say that it is just Gods way of providing me with a certain insight of something that would help me see through clearer eyes, sometimes even messages come from the "dreams" that is if i choose to interpret them that way, instead of as a nightmare where it would seem torturous to be asleep yet awake in your own nightmare. The way you perceive the dreams, properly called sleep paralysis is more than just loss of sleep and more than just a nightmare where in some cases it is almost as if it is your own personal t.v. series, regardless of what it is called i fell as though you and i are one in the same from the way you explained how you you perceive it and connect it to religious views, i admire you and the way you managed to words this, Bravo! Much love * BdillonW
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